Shuttle Anxiety

As the crew of Discovery prepares to come home, there's an edge among those of us who have lived through two shuttle disasters.  Space exploration used to be a no-brainer source of pride now there's doubt -- like a hard shot at our national self-esteem. Now, we wonder if we should let the kids watch.  In case...

When it was seen that Discovery wasn't as fixed as we would like, all the tough memories came flooding back.  Many of them, unfortunately, are the "where-were-you" variety.  As in, "when-the-Challenger-exploded?" or the variation "when-the-Columbia-crashed?"  I'm not making excuses (and it doesn't sound to me like NASA is either) but I'd remind everybody that the world is a dangerous place and trying to leave it in a rocket is even more dangerous.  So, with NASA back on the ropes again, let me offer up a few more positive personal memories:

Nothing routine about space flight

I've always loved space.  As a little kid, I even built an Apollo-like prototype in my basement, made out of cardboard boxes, and tried to stay in it for a few days to experience what the astronauts did.

In 1969, I got fired from my first job in order to watch the moon walk live.  That's a pretty good story.  Click here to check it out.

In 1981, while working at the Los Angeles PBS affiliate, I cobbled together enough funding to send a photographer, soundman and myself to the Cape to cover the second shuttle launch.  I remember thinking that it was a whole lot louder when it took off than television can capture, and that the launch flame as it escaped was a whole lot brighter.  It was breathtaking, partly, I suppose, because it was so obviously dangerous.

Five years later, I had applied to the "Journalist-in-Space" program, hoping to get selected to fly on one of the next missions.  Then the Challenger blew up with Christa McAuliffe on board as the "Teacher-in-Space" and that pretty much put an end to taking amateurs into space for PR value.  Thinking about all the school kids who were watching, man, that was a horrible day.

During those years, my wife and I drove out to Edwards several times to see the shuttle land.  I remember one 4th of July where it landed and it was like a party out there.  People in their RV's barbequeing, playing patriotic music and waving flags.  That was something.

I pretty much had taken the shuttle as routine again, like everybody else, in 2003.  I was serving as the chairman of the TV Academy and we had scheduled a special Saturday work session for our Board of Governors.  I woke up that day with a full agenda of action items to hear that Discovery had crashed.  The TV set was on during a lot of that meeting.

I love the space shuttle.  I know people debate whether it's the right vehicle for the right mission, and whether or not we should even be building manned spacecraft when it is so much safer and, supposedly, more efficient to go with unmanned craft.  That's probably all true.  No doubt we're watching the final years of the shuttle program.

But I've enjoyed seeing men and women, of all races and nationalities and religions, working together up there in space.  It's an image that's worth something.  And the fact that it's dangerous getting up there and getting home, and that we do it anyway, I think that's good, too.